Three Gifts and a Star
The trail of gratitude on the internet can at times be both long and complex. Case in point: I came across this piece on Christmas gifts at MaryAnn McKibben Dana’s great blog, “The Blue Room,” where she referenced an article written by Gretchen Ziegenhals on Duke’s fine Faith and Leadership website where she (Gretchen) talks about an idea she received at a workshop given by Susan Vogt.
Still with me…? 🙂 I suppose it doesn’t matter. Here are the relevant paragraphs on Christmas gift-giving at home, first from Gretchen (as quoted by MaryAnn):
At a retreat on Christian life, I heard Susan V. Vogt describe a wonderful tradition suggested in her book “Raising Kids Who Will Make a Difference: Helping Your Family Live with Integrity, Value, Simplicity, and Care for Others.” A parent of four kids herself and a counselor and family life educator, she had tried her own experiments with gift giving, eventually settling on a simple yet elegant plan: she and her husband give each of their children only three gifts for Christmas — a “heart’s desire,” a piece of clothing and “something to grow on.”
I liked her idea immediately. Giving these gifts would ensure that the needs and wants of each child would be met, that each would receive an equal number of gifts, and that we would have a structure to help us resist the cultural message to run out and buy.
I liked this idea as well. Simple, practical, and helpful in enjoying gift-giving while keeping the focus on the reason for the gifts. As MaryAnn went on to say – which I just love, btw – “My friend Sherry gives her kids three gifts because ‘It was good enough for Jesus.’”
We’re trying that out at our house this year as well, but with one twist; we’re adding a fourth gift in honor of the star that led the three magi to Bethlehem. The “star-gift,” though, is something we are giving each of the kids for them to give to someone else. Perhaps a gift certificate to Kiva, so that they can make a loan, or a dollar amount they can spend on Heiffer animals, or something to offer to a charity that is important to them. We’ve talked it over with the kids, and not only are they having fun thinking of their (reasonable!) heart’s desire gift but also having even more fun thinking about what cause to support.
I’ll put a few links to some of the catalogues and causes we’ve found helpful below. In the meantime, my thanks to MaryAnn, Gretchen, Susan, and Sherry (whoever she may be :))!
Another good idea for “star-gifts” for kids, teachers, and anyone else on your list is a “Tis Best” gift card, which allows them to choose from among hundreds of charities to support. Thanks for linking to Gretchen’s article — it has definitely shaped our approach to Christmas with our kids this year!
We have long practiced the 3 gift idea at our house – our model is one “gold” gift (something you really want), something you need (usually clothes) and something we can do as a family (board game, tickets to an event etc.). We have always told the kids the same thing too – “You don’t need any more gifts than Jesus received!” It has always worked very well in our house. I love the addition of the star gift. We have used that in our gifting to others – often using ELCA good gifts, but I love helping the kids choose a star gift each year.