Most of life, I think, is a dance between our desire to be loved and accepted, on the one hand, and a desire to protect ourselves from being rejected and hurt on the other. The trouble is, these two desires are most often at odds. That is, the only way you can believe you are really loved and accepted is if you allow yourself to be really known. That is, you stop pretending to be someone else; otherwise, you can never know for sure if they love you or the person you’re pretending to be. But to allow yourself to be known is a risk. The person to whom you reveal yourself may not like you, or may reject you, or may run away from you....

Over the last two years I’ve been directing a research project at Luther Seminary that seeks to understand a little better what makes congregations thrive. Toward this end, we’ve partnered with about 40 congregations across the country and worked with them to discover what seems to work the best as they invite people more deeply into the faith. We’re at a point in the research where teams of two faculty members from Luther are traveling to visit each of the congregations. Our job, really, is just to listen to what these congregations are discovering and learn a) what we can share with other congregations and b) what we can do better at...